I stumbled upon an interesting story about “the nice person gene” this morning, and it got me thinking … are some people just nicer than others because they’re wired that way?
In today’s world, it seems many people are so concerned with themselves and how to personally benefit or get ahead. It’s kind of reassuring to think that some people are just genuinely good, kind people (I’m lucky enough to have a few of them in my life) – even if environment does still play a factor in it.
Today, Helen, Carolyn (and Addison) and I – aka the MIOS Marketing Department – took a little trip out to Hume, Va., for a meeting planners’ event at Marriott Ranch. The weather was kind of nasty – it has been warm and sunny, so today, we’re due to be outside, so naturally it was cold and raining – but we made some new little friends at the ranch.
So, bottom line of today’s trip … I really want a tiny pig. SO CUTE!!
Earlier today, I came across a short article labeled “’Marrying down’ is an up-and-coming trend among women.” Of course, that prompted me to find the complete article. It went on to briefly discuss the findings of a Institute for Public Policy study, which found that women in their 20s and 30s are more likely to marry men “beneath themselves” – as in, those who marry men of lower income or social classes. (Interestingly enough, they found today’s women still tended to be drawn to older men.)
At the risk of infuriating modern women all over the world … this makes me really sad. Call me old fashioned – I know that I am – but I don’t want to be the high-earner in the relationship. I still want that man who will sweep in and take care of me. Essentially, allow me to work because I want to … not because I have to (thus allowing my someday life plan involving my mommy job of fitness instructor extraordinary to come to fruition). I don’t want to give up on my childhood dream of being a “corporate wife” – putting on a formal dress, dazzling his boss … essentially being one of those women my mom always found annoying (but she knew I’d be great at being one of them). I refuse to give up on my Prince Charming (white horse not necessary – but I will take a nice suit) … I keep telling myself he is out there. Somewhere.
Continuing with my sadness … I can’t help but wonder if such a mindset is what has brought me to very much still single at 31 years old. Did Disney brainwash me into thinking that men should always hold the dominant role in a relationship? Or is it because I was raised by a workaholic dad and a stay-at-home mom? Because honestly, looking at my parents’ relationship, and my childhood … it’s exactly the kind of marriage I want for myself, and the kind of childhood I want for my (someday) children.
I’m not a gold digger, and I’m certainly not willing to sacrifice love for money. I do think I’m a pretty strong woman, and I make enough money to support myself and still save for the future, while having fun and enjoying nice things today. That said, I know that I could never be with someone who would allow me to walk all over him. In my early 20s, I was in a relationship where I was the more successful person, and quite honestly, I did look down upon his lack of drive, or ambition, or desire to climb the ladder. It didn’t work because I didn’t respect him – and it was because I felt like he didn’t respect himself.
I know times have changed, and it’s not the 50s anymore. I’m probably angering some feminists by saying this … but I don’t want to marry down. I’m not comfortable being the more successful partner. I don’t want to be the one bringing home the bacon – I want to be the mom who is there to help with homework, or make cookies for the soccer team. Yes, I want to find that man who will view me as the most important part of his life. But, for both of our sake – I also want his successes to go far beyond just being happy with me.
Just wishing a very Happy Easter everyone! It was a pretty typical Sunday here – started out teaching two classes (the first one only had two people … but the second, my normally scheduled Pilates class, was about the normal turnout – and quite possibly the most men I’ve ever had in a class before … with 5, they made up almost 1/3 of the class).
Spent most of my day locked in on the same thing I’ve been consumed by for the last three weeks – I’ve finally made it to the final book of The Hunger Games. Though I’ve stood pretty firm on not giving in to the hype in the past, Kim convinced me … and they are SO GOOD!! Planning to go see the movie with Emily next weekend (since I passed #1 off to her when I finished it last weekend … and she, too, was done in four days).
Hope you had a great Easter … don’t go overboard now that you’re allowed to pick up whatever you gave up for Lent again! Happy Easter everyone!
This morning, I woke up to a conversation on the radio discussing the best year of your life – apparently some study determined that age would be 33. My thought? Excellent! I’m not even there yet!
I listened for a few minutes (good excuse to stay cuddled up in my blankets, yes?), and the conversation continued to explain that up until this point – and I’m guessing beyond, if you’d let it – your life just continues to get better.
Now, I’ll be the first one to say that I feel like I go through a bit of a metamorphosis every few years. At 31, I don’t feel that I’m the same person I was at 28, and at 28, I wasn’t the same person I was at 25, and at 25, I wasn’t the same person I was at 22 – and God knows I wasn’t the person I was at 18 when I was 22 (thank goodness!). I do feel that I’ve finally gotten to the point where, while I may not totally have it all figured out, I at least know what I want – and a lot of the pieces have fallen into place. I’m fortunate to say that I have a successful “real” career, a “play” side-job that I absolutely love, and I have made some great friends throughout my life. Yes, there is that one elusive piece still missing – someone to share my life with – but I’m continuing to have great faith that, as Kim (one of my very closest friends) always tells me, “he’s just not ready yet.”
So here’s to getting older! I think if nothing else, age has helped me become a little wiser, a little calmer (just ask my mom … or my high school friends), and a little more flexible. No, life is never going to be perfect. But I like to think that although I’m still not exactly where I want to be, I’m on my way.
Yup, must be that time of year again … so I’ve been blonde for a week. You know how it works with me … I get bored, my hair color is the easiest thing to drastically change without going too crazy 🙂
So here it is … what do you think?