Take Me, Baby, Or Leave Me (to quote RENT)

I came across this quote on another blog the other day. I’m inclined to take it as a sign.

A little background: I had a conversation several weeks ago that convinced me that I’m just around the corner from that elusive “having it all.” The catch: I needed to recognize the signs and follow my instincts. So, yeah, seeing a quote so applicable to my life? Sign.

I’m a believer that everything happens for a reason, and that there is a plan for us – one that we may not always understand, but will be much better off once we finally accept.

That said, I’ve also been referred to as “intimidating” on more occasions than I’d care to admit. Why? I have no idea (honestly, I think I’m one of the least intimidating people in the world). Some claim it’s my looks. Some claim that it’s the fact that I have been pretty successful in just about anything I’ve set out to do. Some claim that it’s that I’m a group fitness instructor (and this one continues to stump me more than any of the others).  Seriously?

Now that I have you thinking I’m totally conceited, let me make one thing clear: I have spent most of my life feeling judged. Under the impression that I’m not pretty enough, or skinny enough, or smart enough, or funny enough, or any other something enough. I often just assume that people don’t like me, and wonder if I were just a terrible person in a previous life, and now I am left paying for the sins of a former me.

And yes, that is what has, in many ways, held me back.

And yes, I’m trying hard to stop letting it.

The fact is, attitude is everything. The way you look at a situation or a circumstance is the way that you will see it. I’ve spent a lot of time joking that I’m going to die old and alone. That my family has just stopped asking me if I’m dating anyone, because they know the answer is no.

Instead, I’m going to keep doing what I love, and doing it well. I’m going to keep positive and know that the happiness and positive energy within me is going to draw like-minded people into my life. I deserve to live my life and make myself happy rather worrying about what other people think about it. I don’t want to hold back, and I don’t want to settle. I want it all. I deserve it all. And when the time is right, I will have it all.

I shouldn’t have to justify who I am, and I shouldn’t have to apologize for my mama making me pretty, working my ass off for what I want, or loving exercise so much that I want to share it with others. You know why? Because it is the man who’s impressed by these things who is the right one for me.

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3 thoughts on “Take Me, Baby, Or Leave Me (to quote RENT)

  1. Wow… my feelings exactly (about myself) I have FINALLY come to the conclusion that “I” need to be happy with myself FIRST before I will be happy with others. You’re on the right path!

  2. I like your post, mostly because I probably sit more on the flip side. I know a few people who are super confident, and I have been known to say that I find this kind of person intimidating (not to them, to my friends). The reason why I find confidence intimidating is because I always feel all of the things that you stated about being judged and not being ‘…. enough’ .Often when I’m around confident people I find myself shying away more, and often doubting my own self worth. I’m not sure why that happens…..
    I admire your gusto, and I thank you for reminding me that everyone is human with their own insecurities, whether they show it or not. I’d love to be able to hold my head up high in most situations and tackle life full throttle.
    I dont think you’ll die alone. I think you’ll find a super hot, amazing guy who’ll stand by your side while you achieve it all. You’re right, you deserve it!

  3. LOVE this Sarah! As a fellow single girl that refuses to settle, I can def relate! You have to love yourself and be happy alone before you can be happy in a relationship. By not settling, and braving it alone, we are taking the harder path, but I know in my heart of hearts that it will more than pay off in the end! …and Rent is one of the best musicals of all time, I think I can sing almost the whole thing by memory haha! Great title : )

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